. a step into the insignificance .

2010-09-18T20:13:00.000-07:00

My heart breaks a little each time the tiny plane icon draws further and further away from where I am.

:'(

I won't be waiting because I'll be coming to you. ♥♥

boo.

2010-09-17T06:55:00.000-07:00

These aren't tears that I cry.

This is the blood from my soul.

Praise.

2010-07-27T05:34:00.001-07:00

Praise be to God!

He brought you into my life and through you, He brought me back to the side of our Heavenly Father.

Hallelujah! :)

†

2010-07-25T06:21:00.000-07:00

Dear Heavenly Father,

I pray that You do not abandon me. I love You very much and need You more than ever. I trust in You and I cast my cares upon You.

My God, lead me not into temptation but deliver me from evil.

In Jesus' most Holy name I pray,
Amen.

I miss you.

2010-07-17T05:10:00.000-07:00

I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you .I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you .I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you .I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you .I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you .I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you .I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you .I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you .I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.
I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you .I miss you.

and you mustn't forget that I love you too.

:'(

Joined in Prayer.

2010-06-05T04:29:00.000-07:00

Every time I pray to our Lord, I feel like I'm closer to you.

My Lord Jesus, do not look upon my unworthiness, but rather on my faith and show me Your infinite mercy. Oh Splendour of the Heavenly Father, in whose face shines the light of the divinity, please grant the graces that I have asked.

sigh.

2010-04-29T09:09:00.000-07:00

I'm in love with a heartbreaker.

And all you do is make me cry.

You don't understand,

I'm willing to do anything for you.

I don't think you care about anyone other than yourself.

But I still love you. Always will. I promise.

aw.

2010-01-04T21:48:00.000-08:00

Bring me back to the fairytale that was you and me.

bah.

2009-11-29T09:03:00.001-08:00

Falling for the unknown.

Love is but a stranger.

2009-07-22T07:52:00.000-07:00

My parents came to visit me during the holidays. A refreshing trip to Sydney and Brisbane with a truck load of images loaded onto Flickr. =D

Best Friends.

2009-07-22T07:51:00.001-07:00

What do you do when your best friend ceases to love you?

How.

2009-06-10T22:39:00.000-07:00

How disgusting.

The inability to act independently absolutely disturbs me to the very core.

How irritating.

The need to cling to someone else incessantly just annoys the very depth of my soul.

How shameful.

So embarrassed that I had to write this in the smallest font in hope that it would hide my selfish deeds.

How lonely.

The lack of strength to be alone betrays who I thought I was.

How sorry.

A good lesson in time. Would never do it again.

How naive.

In behavior and in thought.

How touched.

By the grace of Friendship.

Botanics.

2008-06-24T02:06:00.000-07:00

Whoo! Went out for a shoot out at Botanics. There was a lack of insects though, no idea where they went. No matter, there were loads of ants. Really gross. LOL! God, I feel itchy all over talking about them. Brace yourselves for the onslaught of pictures:

Panda in the Grove

We had Macdonald's before walking to SBG and I ordered a Happy Meal. =x (which kinda explains Po's prescence.) WHEE! I FEEL LIKE A KID!

Rust

Rust on the railings of the Gazebo. It was sweltering hot that particular afternoon. I love taking inconspicuous things. <--- (Read: Buy me a macro)

Missing the Dragonfly

WHERE THE HELL ARE THE DRAGONFLIES? Wenting suggested I ps-ed one in. @_@

Park Bench

Crossing the Bridge

Banyan

Am loving this. The tendrils of the banyan tree was beckoning me to come forth and so I did. I reckon it would look better with a model in the composition.

Enchanted

Swans

Ran after these 2 buggers like the paparazzi. Thought I only caught 1 but went home and saw the other one near the overturned boat. LOL. Conniving little bastard.

Boat Lake

Saw this boat when I was really little. It used to be white but it has since been disused.

Khloe

My long lost pri-sch friend and fellow photog enthusiast! xD So glad to have found her again!

Tree

Glory Flower

House beyond the Woods

CAN'T BELIEVE I FORGOT ABOUT CHARGING MY BATTERY. ARGH.

Nevermind, there's always the next trip to look forward to. >.<

More SBG pictures in the next few entries!

Pfft.

2008-06-24T02:04:00.001-07:00

Fine.

Everyone demands for a change and so explains my new blogskin.

Let's live with this one temporarily, shall we?

Till I find a better one.

=)

Hmm.

2008-06-18T01:12:00.000-07:00

wah rau.

you say I should change my blog skin or not?

Vote here:

cheap diet pills - 21phen

Tora

2008-06-17T23:03:00.000-07:00

Today, I shall introduce to you my other wittle poopsiekins.

This is Tora ---- the baby of our family. He's a little lazy and fat.

Tora sleeps through most of the day.

He's rather inquisitive when he's awake. He loves to stare at the neighbours.

Tora has pretty eyes,

And a handsome face.

(Image credited to my Daddy)

He makes a good model, but he has his grouchy days.

Sleep.

Snigger.

2008-06-12T23:10:00.000-07:00

Hmmm. Interesting.

Tears.

2008-03-15T06:24:00.000-07:00

She sacrificed herself for your happiness.

Left sobbing on my bed, wondering what would I do when you're gone.

Loneliness.

2008-01-13T06:24:00.000-08:00

Poor you.

The smell of cash, the sting of alcohol as it rises up your nostrils, the scent of the ladies of the week, mingle within the retched depths of your shell. Empty, broken and desolate ---- never knowing the warmth of the fire. Slumped against the city walls, watching them troop past. Superficiality masked your hurt and sorrow. No one to hold on to as the solitary tear cuts into your heart.

You've lost the meaning of truth many years ago. Lost your way in the meandering crowd, lost yourself in the flashing lights, lost your trust. Love was distant and friendship became foreign.

When will you become one of us again?

Don't float away.

Dearest.

2007-12-04T10:00:00.000-08:00

I wish we were somewhere far away from here. Somewhere we wouldn't hear the chaos of the city. Somewhere, with just the two of us. Somewhere the night wind would gently blow. Let us dance beneathe the stars and as the moon rises high into the sky, we would tumble in the soft grass. Arms around each other with my head on your chest, listening to every breath you take.

I wish we had a world with only the two of us---No war, no pain and no sorrow. We could walk along the beaches of the continents, climb every moutain and swim in every sea. When exhaustion pulls us into her sleepy embrace, we could lay down in any meadow, under any rock or huddle in any cave. We would be so happy. Just the two of us.

Come with me and let me bring you where the galaxies would dot the skies as meteorites streak acorss the dark blanket of the night. The oceans would lap at our feet as the waves whisper our names.

I want to breathe in the salty air of the seas. I want to lie on my back and stare at the clouds as they roll pass. I want to dip my feet into the cool water creek as it lazily makes its way through. I want to count the petals of the flowers in the fields.

I want to tell you, I Love You.

If only, we could grow old together like this. In a world of our own. Just the two of us.

Doll.

2007-11-16T08:13:00.001-08:00

I want to be your doll.

Glassy eyes that stare off into the distance, a perfectly sculpted face gleaming in the moonlight with my lithe limbs poised with grace, frozen in movement as I sit upon your shelf.

Pixie dust --- like snow it falls on a Midnight Summer's Eve. Caught in the tangles of my long silver mane as life was poured into the lifeless shell that I was.

Perhaps we could dance again, just like we did that once, when the moon turned blue.

Snap.

2007-11-05T06:18:00.000-08:00

Like I said, it's going to be SNAPSHOT GALORE for the next few entries!

So, sit back and cringe.

Here are the long awaited pictures from my Hong Kong trip:

. Vacation .

. Stone Lion .

. Vase .

. Inu .

. Colours of Childhood .

. Lovers .

. Prayer Coils .

. Devotion .

. Doorway .

Sorry for making you poor people wait for these photos! This entry should be updated again once I have processed the rest of the photographs. In the meantime, fire away with your comments! An amateur like me has lots to learn, so please hit me with all you've got. I have yet to grasp control of the exposure and some areas might end up over or underexposed. I'm still experimenting with different styles of composition and these may not be the best anyone would have seen.

These are all shot with a Canon Ixus 7oo. Although these shots aren't the best, please reframe from taking them without my permission.

Whatever.

2007-11-04T08:26:00.000-08:00

HumanForSale.com - I am for sale!

And I thought I was priceless.

Lolita.

2007-11-01T03:50:00.000-07:00

I do apologise to all my readers(if there even are), for the long delay in updates. Projects were clogging up most of my life and will most probably continue to do so until the day I die.

But I digress.

Anywho, I do reckon the following few posts would be riddened with photos (if you don't mind) Pictures speak a thousand words and it would save me from doing a whole lot more of my exorbitant rantings.

So for those who are still left wondering what in the world was I doing on my birthday, I'll let you in on my newest obessesion:

Lolita.

Please click images for larger version.

(These scrunched up photos don't flatter my face so much.)

.Sunday's Child.

.Sundial.

.Girl in Hat.

.Etheral Spring.

.Gazebo's Bench.

.With the Girl on the Swing.

I beg thee NOT to nitpick at the techniques used to shoot these photograph.(I am but an amatuer model and my Daddy is definitely not a professional photographer.) I may not be the best model nor is my face that of Venus, but I throughly enjoyed myself that day. It takes real courage to don on those lovely clothes, trying to ignore the curious stares of strangers, but I was really glad that my family was there for me. *smiles* Lolita is the celebration of childhood innocence and fantasies, and I doubt that this would be the last time I would be wearing those beautiful dresses.

Dress from: http://www.annahousefashion.com/

Snort.

2007-10-14T10:00:00.000-07:00

Do you love me like I love you?

Did I ever left your mind for a second?

Was it even true love for you?

I'll have you know that I bathe in the blood of all those who gave me nothing but

empty promises.

For I am Vengeance personified.

Architecture.

2007-07-24T07:59:00.000-07:00

You Know You”re An Architecture Student When...

A litany of depressing behavours.

· The alarm clock tells you when to go to sleep.

· You're not ashamed of drooling in class anymore, especially during Structures lectures

· You know what Superglue tastes like.

· You celebrate space and observe your birthday

· Coffee and Red Bull are tools, not treats.

· People are nauseated just by smelling your caffeine breath.

· You are surprised when you see a new building in your school.

· You think it's possible to create space.

· You've slept more than 20 hours non-stop in a single weekend.

· You fight with inanimate objects.

· You've fallen asleep in the bathroom.

· Your brother or sister thinks he or she is an only child.

· You've listened to all your CDs in less than 48 hours.

· You're not seen in public.

· You lose your house keys for a week and you don't even notice.

· You've brushed your teeth and washed your hair in the university's bathroom.

· You've discovered the benefits of having none or very short hair, and you've started to
appreciate inheriting baldness.

· You've used an entire role of film to photograph the footpath.

· You know the exact time the vending machines are refilled.

· You always carry your deodorant.

· You become excellent at recycling when making models.

· When you try to communicate, you make a continuous and monotonous whine.

· You've danced YMCA with excellent choreography at 3 am and without a single drop of
alcohol in your body.

· You take notes and leave messages with a rapidograph and colour markers.

· You combine breakfast, lunch and dinner into one single meal.

· You see holidays only as extra sleeping time.

· You've got more photographs of buildings than of actual people.

· You've taken your girlfriend (boyfriend) on a date to a construction site.

· You've realised that French curves are not that exciting.

· You can live without human contact, food or daylight, but if you can't print it's chaos.

· When you're being shown pictures of a trip, you ask about the human scale

· You can use Photoshop, Illustrator and make a web page, but you don't know how to
use Excel.

· You refer to great architects (dead or alive) by their first name as if you knew them (Frank, Corbu, Mies, Norman).

· You buy 50 dollars worth of magazines that you haven't read yet.

· When someone offers you a Bic pen, you feel offended.

My friend passed me this today. I am an architecture student and I swear at least 95% of the list applies to me. So for all those who tried to ask me out in vain, I offer my most heartfelt apologies.

You guys better be understanding!

Death.

2007-07-22T10:42:00.000-07:00

I'm scared.

I've probably told you this before.

I never liked that tag you wear around your neck. It scares me.

Like a reminder of our vulnerability, the cold metal stares back at me menancingly.

Promise me you would never leave me. You know I won't be able to go on.

I want to be the last one to hold you until the last of your warmth leaves you. I want to be the one who kisses you as you breathe your last. I'll link my fingers with yours, if that would make you feel better, trying in vain to hold on to that life force slowly ebbing away from your frail body.

If I were an angel, I would carry you into Heaven's gates. At least, we can be together in a place free from the pain this world has cruelly etched upon our backs.

Green.

2007-07-18T04:34:00.000-07:00

To help with my sanity and to help me cope while the days roll by as I wait for my darling to book out of camp, I shall blog about something happy for once.

Warning: Extreme "Bleah" Content Ahead

Don't say I didn't warn you.

Tuesday 12th July 2007

We arranged to meet at 7.

I got off school at 5.

With so much time to waste, I strolled out of school. I contemplated on getting materials for my model before the date.

As I settled into my seat on the train, it became clear that I was very much glued to where I was.

Upon reaching the pre-designated place, I wandered about aimlessly. I decided to plant myself in the bookshop, browsing through random books till he arrived.

Baby didn't want to eat dinner so I made him buy my food while I fiddle with the salt and cheese shakers.

And then, here's the main point of today's entry:

Holding hands, we decided to explore the various shops. Stumbling upon a food/utensils/Tupperware sale, my little eye spied boxes of Pocky. Now now, before you dismiss these boxes of Pocky as a commodity, allow me to explain:

Far from being commodities, those Pocky(s) in question were Macha Pocky(s)! Macha fever swept us off our feet as we picked up various other macha-flavoured tidbits --- Macha-flavoured cookies, macha-flavoured mochi,

AND

friggin >>MACHA-FLAVOURED KIT KATs<<

From Top: Macha Mochi, Macha Kit Kat, Macha Pocky, Macha Cookies

Oh.

My.

Macha-Flavoured.

God.

They actually sold Green Tea Kit-Kats!

More just green sticks of chocolate, they actually have camouflage patterns on them!
Here's a close up:

Look at how perfectly the Kit Kat blends in with the military uniform. Kit-Kats for the army! Now soldiers can eat Kit-Kats with ease, without the fear of being spotted!

We ripped open the package excitedly, hoping to get a glimpse of the camo Kit Kat, but man, were we disappointed.

About them being more than just green sticks of chocolate? OK, I take that statement back. They were just PLAIN GREEN sticks of chocolate waffle with a really, really super faint imprint of the camo pattern. The image above was photoshopped to show as best as I can, the camouflage of the Kit-Kats.

*Big Huge Pouty Face* HMMMMPH!

Baby then decided to do something funny with the disappointingly-plain-green Kit Kats.

Aiya, fuck the Kit Kat. Baby look so cute can? I'll take a bite out of Baby over that Kit Kat any day. >.< raawr.

Just as we were peeling open the boxes of green-tea paradise, a family decided to plonk themselves down beside us with only a 100mm gap between them and us. Hello?! We are a couple, dating with a captial 'D'? Does it occur to you that YOU might be intruding into OUR private time TOGETHER? For a second, I wanted to french my boyfriend just to see if they would be digusted and then bugger off with their stupid baby and shopping in tow.

For some reason that night, we bumped into another inconsiderate person at the taxi stand. It wasn't a long wait, we were at the front of the line in a matter of minutes. But this STOOPID aunty just HAD to cut our queue and wave her arm like a maniac at every passing cab.

Baby pointed out that she felt bad after awhile and pretended to flail her arm about like she had a cramp in her elbow or something. Jeez, what a stupid cover up.

Argh. People these days.

Beauty.

2007-07-16T03:15:00.000-07:00

Beauty.

A perfect lie.

You think you've got big eyes, a pretty little nose and a ruby red mouth.

Look at me straight in the eye and wipe off the layers of pretense. Tell me what do you see in the mirror?

You cringe. What are you without your mask? Nothing next to dust.

Without your mask, you're just a hollow shell. You never had a soul to start with, you could never shine. Desperate for perfection, you slap on your powder, lipstick, mascara, anything to transform you into something you crave for but can never truly have . You are such a monster.

Don't say you have beautiful eyes when they are just pitless pools of emptiness. Don't say you have alabaster white skin when the sallow hue beneathe threatens to soak through.

My face, nude as it is, stands apart from you. Unlike me, you have already lost your grip on the truth. Every blemish, crooked tooth and bad jaw is worth the false eyelashes, lipgloss and that painfully stiff upward gaze as you tried to smile into the camera---all part of the ritual you religiously partake. A ritual to cleanse you of .....you.

People gasp as you walk past, not because of your "beauty", but from the lack of something human from your face. A face plastered with lies is always worth a second glance of mockery.

Afriad to lose your humanity, you look for assurance. You want someone to acknowledge your pretty little face. Trust me, we did it out of pity.

Or maybe, secretly deep down inside, you know that you are ugly.

Stripped bare and exposed, you know you can never stand up against me.

I may not be the best in the world. But at least, I am still me.

What is wrong, you say, to lust for beauty?

I never said that it was wrong.

You just weren't born with it

But if you want, I can be your perfect little doll, living the perfect little lie.

You recognise this. Theme song from Nip/Tuck. Listen. It's very appropriate.

Damn.

2007-07-13T23:09:00.000-07:00

Goddamn leave me alone.

I already bled you a fucking ocean.

Stop telling me about the sacrifices you made.

They ain't nothing compared to mine.

Sleep.

2007-07-03T05:34:00.001-07:00

Sleep.

Such an addictive drug when you are tired. Sleep is such a great cure when you are hungover from caffeine.

Placed your picture in front of me while I worked, just like how you thought of me when times got tough. We were finally reunited at the end of the tumultous 2 weeks just to be torn away yet again. Spending time with you was such a breath of fresh air as stress released its noose ever so slightly around my neck.

Hate.

2007-06-20T08:08:00.000-07:00

The goddamn army doesn't just lock boys up

behind those darn walls

They turn them into one.

Fuck. I feel like giving up on you. Then again,
that's just the frustration talking.

Argh.

2007-06-19T10:03:00.000-07:00

As Time Ticks On,

I Feel It Coming.

Like A Wave,

Panic Grips Me.

I Feel It Coming.

Such Is A Feeling

I Dread.

Sigh.

2007-06-15T08:13:00.000-07:00

Determination and concentration work really different from one another. You may

have the passion to do something but when the time comes for you to really

crack your head and think about things, you just wouldn't sit still. I feel a sense

of urgency towards my work. There's a need to get things done, but I can't seem

to bring myself to do it. I love my studies really --- bringing your imagination

into reality, what's there not to love?

My other love just left me today, forcefully submerged into an alternate world of

uptight discipline and military precision. Now, it just feels even colder. Never

mind the fact that it's just 2 bus stops down now as compared to the usual hour

of a journey. Impregnable walls now stand between us. They say boys turn into

men behind those walls, while the girls left outside these gates just learn to

grow up. Emotionally bonded, its really hard to tear away. Nothing but a ring and

a kiss on the cheek, I watched him disappear into the crowd.

That scent. That strangely comforting scent. Lingering in my memory, I don't

want to ever forget. It makes him feel close. Close my eyes to reminiscent about

the warmth of his embrace, I never want to let go. Tears that did not fall then,

spill over like little pearls now.

I hope I am still your reason to smile because you are and always will be.

With the wind in my hair, I will be waiting. Always.

Fuck.

2006-12-04T10:19:00.000-08:00

Sometimes

I really wanna say

I DON'T WANT TO LOVE YOU ANYMORE!

But

I know that would be the biggest lie

I would have to live

For the rest of my life

you piece of shit. I hate you. Yet, I love you. Fuck you.

Sniff.

2006-10-22T07:38:00.000-07:00

Imagine if there were two of you.

Someone else with your eyes, your smile and your touch.

Like your reflection magically stepping out of the mirror, someone who looks

exactly like you.

But...could he really be you? Or is he someone you could never be and he who

could never be you?

In the age where the concept of God turns obsolete, Man began to make copies

of Himself as our poor souls thirst for the very Elixir of Immortality. As carelessly

as we lived in our mortal shells, secretly we fear for the Trials that await us at

the end of the Tunnel. Like the insecure creatures

we all are, we stubbornly clung on to our Earthly Cocoons. Physical beings, we

could replicate.

Souls were something of a Higher Order, something Divine. Something that is too

confounding

for the simplicity of our minds to comprehend---Souls were more than mere

mixtures of

chemicals.

And then, there was It. A gift given to The Girl from The Boy, it was souless like

the rest. It was

a mere vessel for the Artificial Soul, a substitute for The Boy when he couldn't

accompany The

Girl.It came without the knowledge of the world, armed with a sole purpose of

lovin her in his

place.

For convenience's sake, It shall be known as the Unnatural.She was there for his

Awakening,and

the for the first time He set eyes on Her, she let out a gasp at the startling

similarity while a

strange feeling swell up in the Unnatural's chest. He has yet to grasp the

meaning of it, but he

would soon learn that it was none other than love. Placing hands onto his cheeks

with much

uncertainty, She blinked at him with great puzzlement.Though one was a spitting

image of the

other, she thought she caught a glimspe of something...different in Its eyes.

Before she could put

a finger to it, she felt Its arms around her as she buried her face in Its chest. A

familiar touch,

but somehow the feeling was....different.

The first word the Unnatural learnt was her name. It felt sweet and like pearls, it

rolled off his

tongue with ease. He could still remember the smile on her face as he whispered

her name, pure

and innocent just like he was. He would wait by the door when he heard her keys

tinkling

"Welcome home" "I missed you"

Linking her arms around his waist, he could breathe in the scent of her hair, Milk

and Cream,

like cookies. Little that he know, those words weren't meant for him, for he was

nothing but an

Unnatural. Slipping her hand into his, he felt that they were relatively smaller as

compared to

his.

"Let me show you something..."

She has taken to calling Him The Boy's name. Deep down inside, He knew He

wasn't The Boy

but He didn't mind, as long as it was her calling him.But what pained him the

most, was the

smile she gave The Boy --- full of love and passion, they were smiles he rarely

got from her. A

far cry from the ones filled with sympathy and a distant longing for someone

else. It wasn't soon the Unnatural became acquainted with Jealousy.

Secretly, He began wanting her as his own.

To be Continued

Hmph.

2006-09-13T09:36:00.000-07:00

I just realised.

I'm an escapist.

Maybe that's why I don't do MSN that often.

School, GEMs, Work, Teachers, Grades are some of the words I'm trying to hide from. When

things gets stressful, I avoid them. But when night falls and I'm alone in bed, they return to

haunt me. Words and events spin in my head as I try to get a grip on myself. There's always so

much to do. Try as I might, I can't gather the strength I need so badly.

Maybe this is why I love to immerse myself in the beauty of nature. I long to be free. Living only

for today and tommorrow and the day after. To dance in the snow flakes, to walk in the rain, to

smell the breath of the morning. Running through the shallow waters, through the lush greenery

with the tiny blades of grass peeping through my toes, stopping only when I want to. God, piano

music always make me feel sentimental.

Living in a world without evil, that's wistful thinking. There are no demons. The only demons

are the deeds you commit, bringing hurt to yourself and others. Was there ever a time people

trusted each other with all their hearts? Was there ever a time when everyone knew everyone?

We practically breathe the same air, how come one can be so different from the other? What

could have forged the evil in the hearts of those who kept dark secrets? Weren't we taught to

love as child? Have you forgotten that? Innocent as we were back then, I watched as two kids

scrawled 'L-O-V-E' on the water droplets which had condensed against the cool glass of the

meat freezer. Innocent love between two souls bound together for eternity. Something I would

like to have, but I'm not sure if I do. To fall in love so naturaly without the artificiality of asking

someone to be your companion. Lovers who need nothing from each other but comfort for their

souls in this world full of wars and tears. Would you be there for me when it gets cold? I can still

feel you though. Would you still hold my hand when loneliness creeps into my heart? I can

still remember the day our fingers found each other. I will always remember the excitement you

had in your eyes when you cranked the handles of each tiny musical box to hear which of them

played "Happy Birthday". You asked me if I had any of those, I shook my head and said no. I

wasn't lying even though I received my first muscial box when I was just five, I never had a

muscial box filled with so much love.

"I love you."

Could I trust you with that? I gave my heart to you with those three words. But I still caught

myself crying at night. He asked me what was it that I saw in you. Honestly I don't know. Was it

your smile? Your eyes? Your hair? I really don't know.

Sometimes I wonder, if you really loved me...

Sometimes I wonder, if we could hold onto one another, trusting with all our hearts on those

three words.

Sometimes I wonder, if we weren't meant to be...

I often told myself that I would let you go if you seemed happier elsewhere, but I know deep

down inside, I would still need you more than anything else.

Here's to an awkward start...o.O

2006-04-20T06:17:00.000-07:00

Hmm...this is weird. It's always weird starting something new.

Exciting for some, but in this case really weird for me.

Awkward, really. It's like meeting someone for the first time and not knowing what to say.

Same goes for the first entry of my blog. I have absolutely no idea what my blog should be like.

I'm not referring to the outlook of my blog, but more on the content of my blog.

Should it be based primarily on my life? (Nah..you guys have your own lives to worry about.)

Or maybe it should be based on a theme? Taking a stab at politics?

(Hmm...that won't work. I mean, look at Speaker's Corner. =/

Singaporeans aren't too interested in politics anyways.

They just let the high and mighty do their thaaang.

Always trust the government! Didn't your mama tell you that?)

Or how about those Maple Story-themed blogs?

I could write about my adventures as a lvl 68 cleric in Maple land!

How I pwn noobs and get pwned by players of a higher lvl.

Oh! I can even write about my training adventures!

Jumping around and attacking the EXACT SAME monsters for a good 4 to 5 hrs a day!

How interesting is that eh?

God.

How I hate writer's block. It's been a long time since I've got my creative juices flowing.

(What?! Architecture don't require you to write novels!

Opinionated essays, yes.

But never those nice compositions where you get lose yourself in Utopia full of flowery language.)

Ahhhh. My story writing days.

It's the time when you dream and fantasize (Mind you, they are definitely not

those "fantasies" of you pervs out there!!! ROAR~)

And its the time when you pick up that pen, pencil, whatever and write down the every bit of detail of the vision you have in your head, for fear of forgetting that wonderful thought. It's like drawing with words really.

There's where the phrase "paint a picture in your head" comes from.

But words can be confusing. Nonethless, confusion can be a beautiful thing.

It is this very confusion that give words life. By that I mean, perspectives and interpretation.

Ahhhh. The intricate wirings of the mind. Never the same for 2 people.

Hmm...whatever.